Occasional Scribbles

Been rather quiet on the diet business lately.  I’ve got over the fact that I didn’t get down to anywhere near what I wanted to for my niece’s wedding.  I could make lots of excuses, that’s never difficult.  I could say for example, that knowing I had a whole year to get myself sorted, I did leave it far too late.  I could say that I was extremely depressed during the winter months and I was.  When I feel like that, I shut myself away, see no one, stay indoors and hide myself away.  All the wrong things in fact.  Shutting myself away like that means not enough exercise, enough fresh air (however cold) and worse, I eat all the things I shouldn’t in an effort to cheer myself up which has precisely the opposite effect, since I then feel guilty and even worse.

Once Spring rose out of the depths of winter and I could see flowers and it got warmer, my moods lifted considerably.  The first glimpse of tiny cyclamens in the garden, always the first to appear, followed by darling little snowdrops brought a feeling of optimism sorely lacking in the winter months.  As summer arrived proper, I shook off the invisible chains that kept me bound in a sorrowful state.  But how quickly the warm days go.  We are already way past the longest day, and all too soon it will be September, the month I  least like in the summer.  September is horrid.  It is the beginning of the new school year for one thing, always a depressing thought.  It marks the end of summer and beginning of Autumn and though there are parts of autumn that I like, the prospect of winter looming up again is something I cannot rid from my mind.  It is not so much that it is cold and bleak in winter.  I like bleak, I like it when it is cold and raining and I can light the fire and pickle in.  It is the bare trees and lack of flowers, the garden being dead that makes it so mean and ugly.  

But I must not let my thoughts wander or I will grab a peice of chocolate to cheer myself up!  The truth is, today it is the most beautiful day.  It is HOT!  A light breeze is tickling the leaves of the Oak trees and Silver Birch.  There are a many butterflies around which are so lovely.  The birds are having dust baths and the young black birds sit with their wings spread, sunbathing on the hot grass.  Apart from the Cuckoos who are making their rapid, urgent sounds all is very peaceful.  Doves are cooing, a sound I love that is so redolent of summer.  Even Skinny is stretched out on the grass, dreaming her dreams, muzzle twitching from time to time and emitting whimpering sounds.

I myself am feeling light today; light hearted and ‘lite’.  I am indeed a few pounds lighter and have lost a stone now in all.  Not a lot given the length of time, but nevertheless, enough to feel a change.  I have two pairs of jeans that I wear a lot.  Both are size 14 though one pair is really loose (stretched) and the other which was a bit too tight a while ago, now fit pretty well.  Still a little tight, but perfectly wearable.  My next target is to get into a size 12 – a proper size 12, not a size 12 that I can only just squeeze into!  The beauty of summer, is that it is so much easier to eat less.  It is too hot to eat anything but very light meals and snacks.  Fruit, which in winter, I almost never eat, is now a pleasure and with summer vegetables in abundance, it is very easy not to overdo things.  Alcohol is of course one of the most damaging things to a diet, set to demolish any attempts at sensible eating.  I have been very good on this front lately.  I have nothing alcoholic in the house at present and haven’t had for nearly two weeks.  Since I am partial to scotch, that is just as well.

A few months back when I was seriously keeping to a strict number of calories and spending a lot of time considering what I was/was not allowed, to eat, I was thinking of writing a diet book.  I was full of the enthusiasm that comes with a fanatic, that mad sparkle in the eye of the know-it-all.  But now that I have calmed down a bit, I realise that there is no magic to diets.  There are plenty of fads and heaven kows there are millions of books and regimes on the subject.  But the truth is, the entire subject can be covered in one line.  What you put in, must be used up!  Any left overs will turn into fat.  I could scarcely turn that into a book now oculd I?  Of course one can twaddle on about calorific values, daily eating menus and so on and so forth, but really that just fills pages.  As I hate any form of formal exercise, I could hardly tell other people to get down to the gym.  I prefer to walk with Skinny, cycle occasionally and do the garden, housework and shopping for my exercise.  So I think I shall shelve that idea!

And now that it is cooler, I am off with skinny to walk through the corn fields, golden now and ready for harvesting.  It really is a beautiful summer day!